This little ditty should be sung to the tune of Gloria Gaynor's 'I Will Survive'.

'At first I was amazed,
Although I was dignified

When Merrill offered me the top job,
I almost died

But I've spent so many nights wondering what went wrong,
Our firm is strong,
We just need to get along

So we'll be back
From this bad place
I've a plan to writedown all our toxic waste

I should have dumped it all at once,
That really was the key

Then all the world's media
Wouldn't be making fun of me

We'll press on,
We know the score

Please believe me
We'll have no writedowns anymore

Our stock will soon be on the move,
No more staff will get the sack

We're getting in the groove
And we'll find our own way back,

The name's John Thain (And I'm not to blame),
But we will survive

Oh, as long as I know how to lead
I'll have my way

I've got my bonus in the bag
Then there's my stock option pay

So I'll survive
I will survive, hey, hey

It took all the self-belief I had
To stay this strong

But with my Goldman pedigree,
I knew I'd get along

I spent oh so many nights
Trying to raise new stock

I couldn't lie,
Them sovereign wealth funds were in shock

But this firm needs me,
Not someone new

One day we'll post a profit
That I promise you

So make fun of us,
We're bouncing back

What's all the fuss
We're turning into Goldman Sachs

We'll press on,
We know the score

Please believe me
We'll have no writedowns anymore

Our stock will soon be on the move,
No more staff will get the sack

We're getting in the groove
And we'll find our own way back,

The name's John Thain (And I'm not to blame)
But we will survive

We'll press on,
We know the score

Please believe me
We'll have no writedowns anymore

Our stock will soon be on the move,
No more staff will get the sack

We're getting in the groove
And we'll find our own way back,

The name's John Thain (And I'm not to blame)
Oh, we will survive

As long as I am CEO
We're bound to thrive

I promise you, I'll make it right
(Don't be fooled, I'm really very bright)

Yes we'll survive
We will survive
We will survive.........

Please use the 'E-Mail' button immediately under the article title to send this item to a friend.

He Just Called To Say I'm Firing You

Press here to comment on this story >>

Today in Life: The Best Things in Life are (Still) Free >>

TODAY

• Top Firm Accused Of Bringing Down Lehman
• 'Their Staff...Were Making A Lot More (Than Ours). That Won't Last'
• The So-Called 'Greedy' Lehman Bonus E-Mail

THIS WEEK

• 'My Firm Will Never Fire Me. I'm Untouchable!'
• Top Firm Accused Of Bringing Down Lehman
• 'Their Staff...Were Making A Lot More (Than Ours). That Won't Last'